Love is a Battlefield

The Beatles lied. So did Disney. 'All you need is love' No, all you need is armor and enough ammo to make sure you can survive this crazy thing called marriage. Love is war. We start relationships showing the other person or nation our best qualities and to be honest when we're just getting to know someone who we find interesting, intriguing, and totally worth our time we do not want to see their faults. At least not just yet; we hope that as we grow closer to signing a peace treaty that those 'Top Secret' files will emerge and there will be no secrets. We all have secrets and most of us do not share these secrets, even to the ones we're closest to. This can cause problems, break trusts, and start a war.

War is a dreadful awful thing, and no I'm not talking about the war that is overseas, I'm talking about the war that is raging on in most households across the country. We wake up wondering it today will be the day the enemy surrenders or if we will see that white flag be raised on our side of the battle front. No one wants to surrender, their nation is right, their views, options, ideas, future goals are the only things that matter. For many couples this thinking is ok; especially if their spouse or ally has the same thinking. Unfortunately for many marriages this is not the case. They walked into their homes at night with their ammo strapped on their shoulder, dressed in camo to, hopefully, blend into the surrounding enough that the enemy will not be able to find them and attack. These little battles may not seem like much, but if they are not fought over (talked over) then they will just led to a much bigger and bloodier war.

The war rages on.

For most allying nations secrets can be a damning thing. They keep them locked away in top secret files and with heavily guarded rooms. These secrets are the atomic bombs, when an allying nation finds the secrets, bombs go off, the treaty is broken and HW2 (Household War 2) is on. In some cases a cold war can occur. Nations begin to plot, stockpiling weapons all while keeping a watchful eye on the enemy to make sure they are not doing the same. Cold wars are almost worse; they appear to be friends who are 'trying' to work out their problems but in most cases they are talking with other nations about the downfall that is soon to come.

In times like this it would be suggested to go and speak with the United Nations. Read reports of other countries that went through the same things as you are going through. We study history so we can help prevent it from happening again and yet it continues to happen again and again. The same fight is being fought over and over. Money, drugs, religion, and lies all reasons as to why the war rages on.

My war is raging on.

I walked into the battle field without cover and was soon being fired upon with bullets that I could not dodge. I was hit with hurtful words, hurt feelings and broken promises. Instead of falling back I stood my ground and fired back; words I would regret, things I didn't mean. The heat of war does not come from bullets but from the tears that fall. I carried my body, bloody and battered back to my camp.  I speak with the generals and others in charge as to what the next plan of action should be. Surrender? Night Attack? Blitz? I am tired and feel like I age five years after every battle. I am one of the lucky ones, I have survived yet another fight. Some of the unlucky ones include Trust, Faith, Compassion, and Self Esteem. They didn't even see it coming. How can I forget them now that they are gone? I must fight for them, for their memory in hopes that will be enough to end the awfulness.

We spend our lives searching for 'the one'. We find them, marry them and then what? We marry our best friends, the person we want to share our lives promising our best and then only showing them our worst. Why is it that we feel we can be our worst around the ones that we love the most? Is it because we know they will love us no matter what?  Instead of looking into the future together we stand there head to head fighting for what we want for ourselves. What happened to being on the same side, same team?

I will fight this war, only because I know that what is waiting at the end, the finish is worth the fight. Yes we come out with battle scars, wounds that will take time to heal; but they are worth it when you decided, together as allying nations, to sign a treaty of peace and work on making it work! There will be a day when the war is over. I hope that day brings peace by bringing the two nations together and not parting for good. I do say though, how many lives have to be lost in a war before people realize it is such a waste. There is a time when you have to say enough is enough. No one ever wins the war of 'love' but you can win together. I hope that couples out there realize when they are battling for a good ending and when they are not. I want them to know the difference between a war that can be won and one that can not. When you realize it is a war that can not be won; put your weapon down and raise your white flag. You will find peace because the war is over.